porch on the balcony, two or three o'clock in
the morning, butt naked. - Remind me not to go
on the balcony again. - It's too late. (Laughs) - My name is Jazmin.
- My name is Kevin Miller. - This is my stepdad. - This is my stepdaughter. - [Interviewer] How long? - Eight years.
- Yes, about eight years. (Jazmin laughs) - Have you ever had a threesome with Mom? Would you? - Never had one, with mom. (Both laughing) Baby, would you have a three-way? - [Wife] Hell, no. Somebody could seriously get hurt.
- You go girl. (Both laughing) See, that's why I don't think about it. I might as well just put it outta my mind. All right.
Oh geez. Have you ever stolen from me? - No, what is there to steal? (Woman laughing) - Geez. (Jazmin laughing) - What? - Geez. - You don't have anything.
Have you ever cheated on Mom? - No. - What's the closest you've come to it? - I went out one night and did some things that
I shouldn't have done. I let somebody get too close. - What does that mean, get too close? (Kevin sighs, Jazmin laughs) - I'm gonna take a shot on that one.
Wow, I see how this is gonna go now. - Pull a card. - Okay, yeah, it's my turn now. Alright, if your mom or
dad wasn't in the picture, oh God! (Jazmin laughs) Really? - What's the question? - If your mom or dad
wasn't in the picture, would you date me? - Oh hell no.
- What you mean, hell no? Why not? - No. - What, I'm too old? - Yeah, for one.
- I'm not your type. - You're bald for two. - What bald got to do with it? - I don't want anyone who's bald.
What's one thing you'd change about me? (Kevin sighs) - I like you, who you are. I mean, you know. - But there's nothing that irritates the shit out of you, that I do? - [Wife] You can be a
little bit more honest. - Well, I don't know,
maybe (Jazmin laughs) the weed smoking then.
All right, yeah, the weed smoking. - [Wife] Yeah. - 'Cause, of any parent,
you want to see your kids achieve as much as they can. And smoking weed, sometimes, is gonna stop you from doing some of the things
that you wanna do.
- Yeah, I'm never gonna let that-- - Well, that's good. - Happen. - Well, how often do you smoke? - Every night. (Laughing) What's the meanest thing you've ever said about me to my mom? (Kevin sighs) - That damn cheesecake
you made, (Jazmin laughs) I couldn't stand it.
(Woman laughing) - What, the one I made for Fourth of July? - I didn't like it, I'm
sorry. (Jazmin laughs) I didn't like it. - Was it that bad? - I am sorry baby. - New recipe.
- Oh my God, okay. Have, (both laughing) have you ever heard me
and your mom having sex? - No, because I would have
been banging on the door, being like, shut the fuck up. - Okay. (Both laughing) - Are you guys quiet? - Pretty much.
- I mean, I guess Jayden's
room is next to yours. - Yeah, you gotta be
quiet. (Jazmin laughs) Gotta get up, creak the door closed. Jayden knocks on the door now, every time he sees the door closed.
- Well, I hope he walks
in on you guys one time. (Jazmin laughing) - No, no, he don't wanna see that. He don't wanna see that. - What's the kinkiest thing
that you and Mom have done? (Both laughing) - I don't know.
Me and your mom have
done some wild things. I don't know. (Jazmin laughs) Going out on the back
porch on the balcony, two or three o'clock in
the morning, butt naked. The chair's is leaning--
- Is that why it's crooked? - Yeah.
Every chair out there, that you guys sit in. - Every chair we sit in? - Pretty much. - Would you help me bury the body or turn me in? - Oh, definitely, we bury it. We bury the body.
(Woman laughing) Definitely. (Kevin laughs) - We do Fried Green Tomatoes style. Barbecue 'em, serve 'em. - I love you baby.
- I love you too. - Okay. (Laughing) (glass clanks) - [Interviewer] Good job, y'all. - Yay.
(Cheering) - I know look, people, look. Thank you, hey, mm. (Kissing) Love you. - Love you too.
- God. - You're not that damn old. - You know my back be hurtin'. (Jazmin groans, laughs).
No comments:
Post a Comment