- [Interviewer] Were you guys in love? - Yeah. - Yeah. - We dated for three years. - Maybe like four or five months.
- [Interviewer] When
did you guys break up? - Last week. - [Interviewer] Why did
you guys agree to do this? - This is all his idea, for sure. - [Interviewer] Do you guys
hang out with each other? - Right now, I live in Hawaii of course she lives here in Washington. - [Interviewer] Are you guys
seeing anyone right now? - I'm not.
- I am. - [Interviewer] Do you guys
sleep with each other still? - (Laughs) Okay, you ready? Why did we break up? - Is that for me to answer? - If I ask you the question, then- - Stop. - Why did we break up? - You think I'm trash,
and I think you're stupid. - I just got too mad at you, I think.
I think I was just mad at men all of the sexism at
school, with your friends and I felt like you didn't get it. - I felt like you were
trying to focus on yourself but then at the same time,
you kinda forgot about us. - (Laughs) Oh, man. Rate me in bed, how can I improve? - I feel like you were above
average, does that count? - Rate me in bed, how
can I improve? (Laughs) I'll take a shot with you,
to not answer that question.
- Rate me in bed, how can I improve? - I'll say, a nine. - Okay. - What about me? - An eight. - An eight, dang that's sad.
- (Laughs) Because, you were always tired. There were times where I felt like you could last a little longer. - Were you attracted to any of my friends while we dated, who? - Who the fuck, you didn't even
bring me around your friends so like who? Are we talking about- - Yes, don't drop names. - Were you ever attracted
to any of my friends? - Not that I can remember.
- How about my current friends? - Yeah. - Cause they're all hot as shit! - Yeah, they are. (Laughs) - I'm attracted to my current friends. - What's the most annoying thing about me? - Oh god, no ability to tell time.
- No, I know I'm late, I just- - Yeah, so you actively choose
to be that disrespectful. - When did you realize
it was over between us? - When I found out from my friends that you were bringing some guys around. - Oh, you mean my current
boyfriend. (Laughs) - Yeah.
It was just hard seeing
you with someone else. - Do I ever pop into your
head when you're masturbating? - Yeah. - What am I doing? - Sometimes we're having sex sometimes it's oral sometimes we're just fooling around. - Do I ever pop into your
head when you're masturbating? - I don't masturbate, so, no.
- [Interviewer] Why don't you masturbate? - That's not something I need and when I do need it, I can get it. - (Scoffs) When you need it,
you can get it, like (snaps). - Do I ever pop into your
head when your masturbating? - I haven't done a lot
of it lately, but no. - (Shouts) Wow! Are you thinking about somebody else? - Am I a better lover than
who your currently with be honest.
- The last person I was with, yes. - Am I better in bed than Andre? - I used to think you were. (Laughs) - (makes a hurt noise) - I'm sorry (laughs) - I'm gonna take a drink. - What a freaking question.
- Can I take a drink for that? - Oh, I'm so sorry. - If you could erase every
memory of me, would you? Jesus Christ! - That's dark. Absolutely not. - I would erase you making out with my
friend on the dance floor in front of me.
- To me, if I was at
a bar, and looked over and he was making out
with one of my friends I feel like it's a respect thing you know who you're going home with. - It is a respect thing and that's why respect
levels are different. I respect you enough, not to do it. - Okay.
- There you go. - I would trust that it's
just a fun thing, you know. - Your turn. (Laughs) - See, he doesn't like talking
about these kinds of things.
- If you could erase every
memory of me, would you? - Hell yeah. I'm sorry. I definitely would do that. - Would you really? - Within a heartbeat.
- Oh my gosh you don't see any kind of
good in our relationship? - I would take everything back. - What would it take for
us to get back together? I hate that question. (Laughs) - What would it take for
us to get back together? - You would want to, and I would want to and we would just have
to have a conversation. - I mean, I don't want
to get back together.
- Would you want to get back with me? - Of course I do. - Whoa, that was fast. (Laughs) - [Interviewer] So, what would it take? - Honestly, the only thing it would take is if you moved to Hawaii,
and leaving your boyfriend. - [Interviewer] So, is
the ball in her court? - You could say that.
- Oh, man. - I dare you to post on Facebook,
that we're back together. - Nobody even knew that we were together. - Exactly.
I don't use Facebook, so. - Should I put the kissy emoji? - I dare you to post on Facebook,
that we're back together. - Yeah, no. (Laughs) - Post it.
- You want me to post it? - Yeah, post it. - You know what, this is so uncomfortable. - You'll take it down,
and it will be fine. No one is going to care.
- My phone is gonna blow up. - Me and J Talfasaou are engaged with a ring emoji and a kissy face. - How many likes do you
think we're gonna get? - Probably a lot. - [Interviewer] You guys
are gonna get phone calls.
- Shit. - Oh, fuck. - No, people won't call us. - Who is that? - Oh shit, fuck,it's Zoey.
Hello. - [Woman On phone] Why are
you posting on Facebook that you're engaged? Is this a joke? - No, I'm so serious. I'm deadass. - [Woman on phone] Oh my
god, I have to tell my mom! What the fuck, what the
fuck, what the fuck.
- Dude, my face is
getting so hot right now. - [Woman on phone] What do you mean your face is getting hot? How do you think I feel? I thought we were gonna
be forever alone together. - Yeah, for sure. (Laughs) Love you, bye.
- Who is that? - I dare you to kiss me with tongue take two shots to get out of it. - I mean, there's some consent involved. - What? We can't do this. We can't do that shit.
- [Interviewer] Why not? - Because he's dating someone. - Okay, I respect your boyfriend, so. - [Interviewer] What if you
gus did it with no tongue. He wouldn't care.
- Just a peck? - I guess we can do that. - High five. (Laughter) - Where do you see us in ten years? - I don't know, maybe speaking. - (Laughs) - I don't know where you're gonna be but I'm gonna be
somewhere on a nice beach.
I'll probably have, maybe, one kid. - [Interviewer] Is it his kid? - Fuck no. - I hope you're happy, and have kids even if it doesn't have to be with me. I'm hoping that you'll
be happy no matter what in 10 years.
- I just hope that you can find someone that can love you like you deserve even though it wasn't me. I don't know if we'll be
friends still, in 10 years. (Crying) Sorry. - You started it.
- Do you have any advice for
me, as I date new people? Take a shot. (Laughs) - (laughs) Be more attentive. I hate, that I felt like your
boyfriend of convenience. It was pulling teeth, to get
you to go on a date with me.
And then, the only time
you would hang out with me as your boyfriend was like, I'm going out to this
event, do you want to come? I'm not your boyfriend for
Instagram, or social media or for Snapchat, or for convenience. You have to treat your
boyfriend like a boyfriend. So, there's one. - Do you still love me,
did you ever love me? - Did I ever love you? Yeah, I guess.
(Laughs) - [Interviewer] Who said it first? - You did! You were like, "You
don't have to say it back but I just want to let
you know that I love you." - So, I was drunk. - It doesn't matter, drunk
words speak sober minds. - Do you still love me? - Yeah, absolutely. - Yeah, I love you too.
- Before I saw you here, I
thought I was in love with you but I think that ship has sailed. - When a ship sails, a ship sails. You can't stop that. No matter what the ship sails- - (laughs) I think we got
it, that the ship is sailing.
- Oh my gosh, this is a great time. I've learned so much. - Did you have so much fun? - So much fucking fun. - To buds.
- To buds. - High five. - High five. (Both laugh).
No comments:
Post a Comment